Better than Me
by beachluvr
Summary: One shot songfic. The song is Better than Me, by Hinder. It is an AU where Jordan and Angela did finally, umm…and of course, then he did something to screw it up…this is Jordan’s POV.


**A/N: Taking a short break from **_**Absolutely More**_**, just b/c I've had this idea for a song fic in my head for so long…reading redraiderhottie's entry motivated me to do one as well…I love them…short, one-shot enjoyment and lots of great songs & lyrics to boot…now it's getting back to what's next in my story…if I recall correctly, they are just about to get to the good stuff (again!) see ya in the chapters!**

The song is_Better than Me_, by Hinder. It is an AU where Jordan and Angela did finally, umm…and of course, then he did something to screw it up…this is Jordan's POV.

_I think you can do much better than me  
After all the lies that I made you believe_

I can't believe I actually lied to her. I never would have done that before. Where did everything go wrong? Just when everything was going so right, as usual.

_  
Guilt kicks in and I start to see  
The edge of the bed  
Where your nightgown used to be_

She deserves so much better than anything I could ever give her. I don't know why I ever thought I could even try. But something about her just wrapped itself around my head, around my heart, not letting go. And then I just couldn't let go of her. I just had to have her.

_  
I told myself I won't miss you  
But I remember  
What it feels like beside you_

I told myself once before that I wouldn't miss her. That we could just be friends. I was miserable then. I should have known it wouldn't be any different this time. I can't stand being without her.

_  
I really miss your hair in my face  
And the way your innocence tastes_

She was always so innocent. Even after she became a woman with me. Even after she became an incredibly sensual, sexy woman with me. Even then, she still had a way of looking at me shyly, or being so embarrassed sometimes over the littlest things.

_And I think you should know this  
You deserve much better than me_

I just want her to be happy. I can't stand the look of hurt, of pain on her beautiful face. The look that I put there because I'm such a stupid ass. I hope she knows I want her happiness most of all.

_While looking through your old box of notes  
I found those pictures I took  
That you were looking for  
If there's one memory I don't want to lose  
That time at the mall  
You and me in the dressing room_

How could I screw up something that was the best thing that ever happened to me? How could I not know that I would never have anything that good again, ever again, in my life? I never had so much fun with any other person before. I never let anyone get that close before.

_  
I told myself I won't miss you  
But I remember  
What it feels like beside you_

God, all I can think of is how good her creamy soft skin feels against mine when she's lying next to me in my bed. How happy I feel when she's sitting next to me on the couch, reading one of her books or just watching TV. But now she's gone.

_I really miss your hair in my face  
And the way your innocence tastes  
And I think you should know this  
You deserve much better than me  
_

I'll never know anyone like her again. There isn't anyone like her. She's innocence and wildness all at once. She's happiness and sadness all at once. She's pleasure and pain all at once. And she's gone.

_The bed I'm lying in is getting colder  
Wish I never would've said it's over  
And I can't pretend... I won't think about you when I'm older  
Cause we never really had our closure  
This can't be the end_

Why in the hell did I ever think we could just be friends? I think I knew it even before I said it. I can't just be her friend. I want her too damn much.

_I really miss your hair in my face  
And the way your innocence tastes  
And I think you should know this  
You deserve much better than me_

But she really does deserve better. And I'll never be any better. And she will always be better. And she's gone.

_I really miss your hair in my face  
And the way your innocence tastes  
And I think you should know this  
You deserve much better than me  
(And I think you should know this)  
(You deserve much better than me)_

And she's gone.


End file.
